Words

Always the same, like emotions, they are just our understanding of physiological responses to our thoughts.

Our body sweats, scared, fatigued, hot… simple. But then you see, the words get all twisted up and used to make people feel a certain way. Words should not push the feeling, feeling should push the word.

Then it all gets kinda complex. Do I feel the feeling because of the words or do I really see the thing and feel the truth. Or my truth at least.

Too many factors, the experiment would have too many variables to make a clear evaluation.

Anyway Paradise.

He laughed to himself.

Thief

‘Right we got seven minutes.’ Sean said as they walked purposefully through the maze of shelves, using the light from their phones to illuminate their path to the counter. They jumped over and entered the office closing the door behind them. On a wooden desk they saw the safe perched precariously on top, a large dial and lock on the front. Sean handed Biola the scrap of paper and put the key in the lock.

‘read out the numbers’

Biola responded.

‘clockwise – 18’

Sean twisted the dial so the number 18 was in line with the red marker at the top of the dial where 12 would be on a clock.

‘Anti-clockwise – 33’
Again Sean twisted the dial, but this time in the opposite direction. ‘clockwise – 46’

The dial make a click as if something had released behind the door, they looked at each other and then Sean turned the key with the red tag in the lock. It ran smoothly, and there was a louder click as the heavy door swung open with its own weight and the angle of the desk the safe was sitting upon.

‘Boooom’ Biola cried as he peered into the safe, there were wads and wads of cash, it seemed like more than they had anticipated, it looked like something out of Ocean’s Eleven, it felt like Ocean’s Eleven, maybe they had more than they were expecting? Maybe they could all go home with 5K Biola thought.

‘Shhhhh’ Sean interrupted. ‘Pass me the bag’ Biola paused
‘The bag’ Sean demanded raising his voice a little.

Biola looked around as if he had dropped the bag, but he knew straight away that he had forgotten it, it wasn’t even in the car, he knew exactly where it was, he knew it was back at the flat on the sofa in Sean’s living room.

‘Sh*t man, sorry..’
Sean looked up at him, ‘you kidding me? You chump. F**k man’

But this was no time to despair, The clock was ticking and they needed a solution. Sean was thinking quickly.

‘Get some X-change bags’
‘From where?’ Biola replied
‘F**k knows, behind the counter.’ Sean guessed

Biola quickly responded walking out of the office to the area behind the counter. He started looking through the cupboards, nothing in the first, then he looked into the second, just a load of random stationary and plastic figures from cartoons and computer games that mostly came as freebees when new games came into the shop to help promote the new releases. Biola opened the third door and there was a stack of plastic bags neatly folded.

‘Yees bruv’ he called out to Sean, ‘How many do we want?’ ‘Bring two’ Sean estimated.

They stuffed all the notes into the plastic bags, the wads mainly in tens, a few twenties and some blocks of fives. The denominations low to reflect the value of the sales that the shop made to its customers.

‘Pikeys’ Sean murmured under his breath as if he was justifying the robbery to himself by creating a Robin Hood type of persona.

‘Right, lets go, check Tyrell is cool.’ Sean indicated as he pushed the safe door shut turned the key and picked up his bag.

Squeaky and the Sunshine Fairies

Good morning – said the voice from somewhere up above, good morning squeaky replied with a little yawn. He rolled over in his little bed, scrunched up his little face and let out a looooong sigh. And who will you be today the voice continued. Squeaky paused for a moment and then let out his reply.

“Today I want to be squeaky” he announced proudly.

Squeaky lived in a little hole on the north side of moss valley, he had lived there for as long as he could remember, and he loved his little house, it had a little bed, a small stove, (that he frequently bumped his tail on) a set of shelves and of course a cupboard for all his clothes. 

However despite squeaky being a happy sort of a fellow there was one this missing from his home, his mummy. 

Addiction

It’s hard to say, I could stop and some days I decide today I won’t, but then something happens, friends call me up and we’re off again. I tell myself I don’t have anything better to do so I might as well enjoy now, and it takes the edge of things. You know calms the mind, dulls the mind… you don’t have to think so much. And look I once stoped for two days so it’s not like I can’t.

The Shard

She had been playing by the pond for many months, creating bridges, dams, harbours, sinking stones or fishing them out, but this winter something had caught her attention, something had appeared deep down, right at its heart.

It flickered… sometimes it was bright and shiny, sometimes dull and grey, sometimes it wasn’t there at all. Sometimes she looked and looked but it didn’t appear and sometimes it was there standing proud, staring right back at her, as if it was shouting ‘COME AND GET ME!’

Ugly

They were breathing heavily as they crossed the motorway. It had been a long walk along the side of the fence until they had found a way up and over. They crossed the lanes quickly as the traffic was thin and now with fatigue setting in they needed somewhere to sleep. Slipping and sliding across the loose earth on the banks below the metal barriers, they slowly forced their way through the thick brambles towards the silhouette of a building in the distance.

After 40 minutes or so they arrived, the windows and doors boarded up but the building looked solid. A concrete masterpiece. After a few minutes they found a gap in the fence and had climbed the sharp edges of the spiral staircase, when they reached the top Billy pushed forcefully against the old door and it caved in.

Rich in Rocks

The pace of the afternoon was slow, but the heat made slow the only possible choice. As with all times like these the second hand did it’s best impersonation of the minute hand and the mind began to race.

Jamie stood there staring at the group of his fellow climbers and wished his mind would stop, I suppose the constant inputs from the boredom machines, the social sites and the constant comparisons had trained the mind to move fast. Removed the ability of the mind to go slow or encouraged the mind to constantly evaluate. He shook his body like a dog shaking his fur after being told off by his master, literally shaking the anxiety from his body.

‘So what do you do for money?’ The tall blonde man said to Jamie, surprising him. Jamie looked around the cliff checking that the question was directed at him.

‘Ummm…’ Jamie stuttered, not entirely sure how to answer. ‘I have an apartment I rent.’

‘Perfect’ the tall blonde man replied ‘That’s great, I mean that’s all you need’.

‘Yea… But it won’t last forever. I mean at some point I will have to do something else.’

The blonde man smiled at Jamie and stood up. ‘Well when you need to you will. And at that point you will be rich, rich in rocks.’

It sounded like he was going to continue, but he didn’t, he just walked away clasping the hand of his daughter. Jamie stared at the back of the couple confused but finally the second hand slowed, his shoulders relaxed, the race was run.

Run

It all happens so quickly, you are lost in your own mind, with your own thoughts and things just happen around you. You make up your own narrative and run from one ’emergency’ to the next. Each conversation, each thought is so ‘important’ it is hard to stop.

I tried hard to pause, to think clearly, rationally and tried to normalise some of the situations, but in the end thoughts led to more thoughts and continued to be complex. So I continued to run, continued to make everything complicated, till it all stopped and I wrote it down.

‘There was a world where once I stood, chasing all the things that i knew i could, I would fight and fight with all my might until everything ahead of me was perfect, was just right. But then sometimes those things I thought were good would fade away again and again alone I stood, promises of things so out of my reach teased and tempt me daring me to believe, but in the end nothing would be left and I would struggle for my next breath.

The trap built by thoughts and lonesome minds to find the weak and waste their time. I turned to them and said goodbye and now I’m free to find a true high. Sometimes if you grasp what you want too tight, you might suffocate what makes it right. So let’s not talk of promises and future plans, let’s take the present tenderly in our hands, softly softly until it can grow, watered by laughter, smiles and, well you know. Your heart has been broken, life not your friend, but you will be free, released from your prison and your heart will mend. Your hello hello, your bouncy bounce, your sexy bum, your angry frown, all I know now and it is true, you’re the sexiest girl I ever knew.’

Power

Lights, give the people what they want, give them everything, let them take it all.

‘Pame ligo’ they screamed

It’s yours the earth and you are not here for long, so take and keep taking, the quicker you take the better…

‘Well better for us’ they laughed, and the station kicked into overdrive. The next years P&L account would look even healthier than the last.