Category: challenge

Trap

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I always thought I knew myself and I understood what I thought was a way. Not necessarily the right way… but a way a could live with. A path that I could connect and commit to.

But she had a way that made me question my thoughts. There were times when she would call me out on what I was thinking, but I was never sure I was thinking it until she said it. Or was I? To be honest I think i was thinking of her reaction to what I know she was going to think, maybe making her think I was thinking the thing she didn’t want me to think. Ha! That’s a lot of thinking.

It’s like an advert for something on your social media platforms that appears and you are sure you only thought about it. Never spoke the words, never wrote the words, but there it was the spider ready to take your money… or your mind.

I understand that every ‘relationship’ changes you, you mould, your eyes see new perspective. But when you lose yourself. That can’t be right. Surely the words the thoughts should make you feel trapped.

Instant

Posted in beauty, Breath, challenge, chase, emotion, feel, future, imagination, landscape, Photograph, spiritual, thoughtsTagged , , , , Leave a comment

It’s strange, sometimes you just know, you pick your head up and see it. The picture is clear it says something to you straight away. You look them in the eyes and instantly there is a connexion. But then, all the shit gets muddled, the perception of them, the self perception of you and the ‘what’s the right’ just gets in the way, so you stop. You reach the end of the road and that’s that. The eyes don’t look the same, the feeling in the heart is different and there is just a little sadness in the mind. What might have been, what could have been done differently, it all moves away.

I wish I would really seize the moment, capture it, act on it, stretch out that first flash when you saw the picture, when you felt the bite, like the tickle on your teeth when you bite down on a perfectly ripe nectarine. Or maybe if I did it would be awkward and bitter and the reality would be much worse than the thought in the imagination. Maybe the teeth would just find the stone.

Addiction

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It’s hard to say, I could stop and some days I decide today I won’t, but then something happens, friends call me up and we’re off again. I tell myself I don’t have anything better to do so I might as well enjoy now, and it takes the edge of things. You know calms the mind, dulls the mind… you don’t have to think so much. And look I once stoped for two days so it’s not like I can’t.

Ugly

Posted in abandoned, art, broken, challenge, climbing, derelict, escape, imagination, PhotographTagged , , , , , Leave a comment

They were breathing heavily as they crossed the motorway. It had been a long walk along the side of the fence until they had found a way up and over. They crossed the lanes quickly as the traffic was thin and now with fatigue setting in they needed somewhere to sleep. Slipping and sliding across the loose earth on the banks below the metal barriers, they slowly forced their way through the thick brambles towards the silhouette of a building in the distance.

After 40 minutes or so they arrived, the windows and doors boarded up but the building looked solid. A concrete masterpiece. After a few minutes they found a gap in the fence and had climbed the sharp edges of the spiral staircase, when they reached the top Billy pushed forcefully against the old door and it caved in.

Big Kids

Posted in art, blue vein, challenge, Childhood, children's story, drama, Everything, feel, friendship, game, imagination, macro, old, Play, scene, story, thoughts, toyTagged , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Things moved fast, life didn’t change much, but there never seemed to be a moment to pause. There was always someone to chat to or laugh with, and you were always close to them, parked up next door or across the road. You could drive somewhere else, but inevitably someone would turn up and then play would resume.

The funniest times were when crews with children turned up, two little rat-bags running around the wild, covered in dirt, but beaming with smiles. It was great to see them play, their imaginations were alive, their toys broken but ingrained with evidence of many stories.

It made me think about our own family, maybe we were all just a bunch of big kids and moving fast wasn’t such a bad thing, maybe it kept our own imaginations alive.

A Little Magic

Posted in art, beauty, birds, challenge, climbing, imagination, landscape, nature, scene, story, thoughts, Why?Tagged , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Sometimes I have to tell myself to look around, to stop and appreciate what’s around me. But most of the time I just stare at the rock. It’s hard to look around when your focus is elsewhere. But one day I will, it will probably be too late and I will have missed the chance of a good view, but I promise myself, when I am old and can’t climb as much, I will stop to look around.

Despite promising himself the time to look around was going to be later, Matty was surprised. He was up early at the top of the cliff, he and his climbing partner James had stayed the night on the rocks and were preparing to continue their assent. Dawn was breaking and the light was blue. Matty turned to look at the pitches below him, to seek out the valley floor, but his view was interrupted by the clouds marching in below him.

The valley quickly filled and Matty nudged his mate to wake him. James opened his eyes slowly, sat up on the ledge and let his sleepy eyes dance across the bed of clouds.

‘Wow’ he announced, ‘That’s pretty fuckin cool’.

The two climbers sat in silence breathing in the air letting nature show off in front of them.

Two hours later and the boys were climbing again, making their final push to the top of the cliff, as Matty sat in his harness belaying his friend he thought back to the morning clouds and the excitement they had inspired. Taking his eyes off the rock face he looked to the sky. Above him Vultures circled flying down to his level, swooping below him and then in wide arcs returning up, out of the valley into the clear blue sky. It was a beautiful sound as they passed, huge wings beating slowly, majestically, Matty could almost feel the air they pushed in his direction. He smiled to himself. He smiled back at mother nature.

‘Safe’ James called. The signal that he was secure at the anchor of the pitch. It was his turn to climb.

Causing Chaos

Posted in abandoned, challenge, chase, Childhood, children's story, derelict, drama, feel, friendship, game, imagination, landscape, nature, Photograph, Play, scene, storyTagged , , , , , , , Leave a comment

‘So you want to be one of us?’ Robin announced after a long hiatus, Joseph nodded in reply. ‘Well it’s not that easy you know…’ Joseph didn’t flinch, kept control of his emotions and looked back into Robin’s eyes, not too fiercely, but enough to show he could stand his ground.

‘We can test him first’ Andrew chimed in.

‘Of course we’re gonna test him, everyone gets tested.’ Andrew looked away sheepishly. ‘You think you are up for that?’ he added talking to the new recruit.

Joseph looked up from the floor and nodded, ‘I am fast, what do I have to do?’

The crew nodded at each other. The boys were all sitting in the attic of the ruin at the top of the village, they had transformed it into a base for their crew and met each weekend to organise their next mission. Today was the induction of a new lad, Joseph, who had just arrived in town.

There was some chatter between the crew and after a few moments Joseph turned to the new boy.

‘Okay listen and listen good, I am only gonna say this once.’ Silence fell around the room. ‘First we gonna blindfold you and take you to the centre of town, you gotta find Mr Finlay’s shop and get into the attic, I’ll give you a clue, there is an old fire escape at the back, it’s not solid but if you are quick you’ll get up it.’ The boys all looked at each other, sly smiles emerging on their faces. ‘Then once you are up there you gotta open one of his old chests, I ain’t gonna tell which one you gotta go for, but you gotta find a skull, the bigger the better.’ Robin paused and signalled around the room with his eyes.

Joseph followed his gaze and saw seven or eight large unidentified skulls hanging on a rope high in the room. He hadn’t noticed them before. Robin continued.

‘Once you got the skull you gotta make you way through the alley ways and back to us, but watch out there maybe a few extra challenges on the way.’