Under the Surface

I suffered a lot with my own thoughts, couldn’t keep up with them. They rolled around in my head like a separate entity, like they had a mind of their own. Sometimes I felt clear, confident, in control and then the next minute I was inventing stories, dreaming up a narrative of other people’s behaviour and those stories hurt. They were completely fictional, but to me they were a stronger reality than the truth.

Did any one realise that below the surface my thoughts were complicated, had anyone asked the question, ‘how are you?’. I needed someone to ask, to relieve the tension, because if they didn’t perhaps the spring would snap, perhaps I would break.

Expectation

There was a hush around the stadium, all eyes turned from the track to the Clock End. Now fully in the spotlight Gregory paused. He extended his rear legs stretching them till they were straight, then pulled them back towards his abdomen, he repeated the action twice on both sides. Then he raised his eyes to to the bar for one last time. Held his focus for a moment and returned his gaze back to the invisible line of his approach. Lowering his head he brushed his antenna’s with his front legs, he needed every sense available and clear for his attempt. Finally he turned to the crowd his eyes flicking through the faces, nerves, expectation and hope sketched in their expressions. He set off.

Lumbering forwards feet planted precisely on his invisible line, head arcing from the ground to the bar to initiate the momentum for the jump, two more steps and bang… Gregory drove his back legs into the ground drilling them through the surface, then extending, mirroring his warm up, but with ten times the force, he sucked his front legs close to his chest streamlining his ascent towards his goal. The eyes in the crowd lifted as he left the ground, silence engulfed the stadium. Time stood still as the hoppers body neared the bar, rotated and… and… and cleared it.

As deafening as the silence had been a moment before, it was surpassed by the eruption of sound. A new record had been set and in all honesty might never be beaten.